A Bookend to a Streaming Year
I’ve been streaming on Twitch since 2021, off and on, with long stretches of nothing in between. It’s never been a straight line. There were months where I streamed regularly, felt energized, and believed I was finally building momentum, followed by months where I disappeared entirely. Life happened. Motivation dipped. Mental health got in the way. This year, though, I set a clear goal for myself: consistency.
I wanted to establish a schedule and stick to it. Not chase growth or numbers, not obsess over view counts or follower milestones, just show up when I said I would and see what happened. For the most part, I did that. I say for the most part because there were still gaps, weeks where I fell off or needed to step back. But compared to past years, I showed up more. I tried harder. I built a rhythm where there hadn’t been one before. And honestly, that matters. We don’t talk enough about small victories, but they’re often the only ones we can realistically claim.
That said, comparison has a way of sneaking in anyway. I don’t think I’ll ever reach the level of success some others have found, whether they’ve been doing this longer or in less time than me. I smile when I see small streamers hit their stride within months, building solid audiences and finding their flow almost effortlessly. It’s genuinely impressive. It’s also a reminder that this isn’t something I’ve been able to replicate, no matter how much effort I put in. That realization doesn’t come with bitterness so much as acceptance.
The truth is, I’m not even sure streaming is something I can do long-term. I love it, yes. I love the conversations, the shared moments, the sense of connection that happens when people show up and stay. But streaming is time-consuming in ways that aren’t always obvious. It pulls me in a thousand different directions: planning, tech issues, social media, energy management. Some days, instead of feeling fulfilled, I feel scattered. Aimless. Like I’m pouring energy into something without knowing where it’s really going. I’ve ended streams feeling empty or lost more often than hopeful.
That feeling is what led me here.
This year forced me to slow down and take stock of where I’m actually spending my time and attention. It made me ask harder questions about what I want out of creative work, and what I’m realistically capable of sustaining. Streaming demands presence, consistency, and emotional availability. Some days I can give that freely. Other days, it feels like a weight. It’s a hobby I love, and one I would dream of turning into a career, but the pieces aren’t right. I’m not sure I’m right for it, at least not yet.
Still, I’m not ready to walk away.
I’m giving myself one more year. One more year to focus on content creation and streaming without punishing myself for not measuring up to someone else’s timeline. One more year to build on the consistency I’ve started, to refine what I enjoy about this space, and to let go of what drains me.
This isn’t a promise of success or a declaration that everything will suddenly click. It’s simply a commitment to try honestly, to show up when I can, and to stop treating uncertainty as failure. If, after another year, streaming still feels like it’s pulling me apart instead of helping me grow, I’ll have the clarity to step away knowing I gave it a real chance. I’ll have closure.
For now, that’s enough. One year. One focus. One honest attempt to see where this path leads. This year, I found consistency. Next year, in 2026, maybe I’ll finally find my stride and my voice. Anything is possible.
I hope your streaming goals have been met this year, whenever you happen to be reading this.
This is the final issue of Musings of a Streamer for 2025. I’ll be back in 2026, with a clearer sense of where I’m headed.
Musings of Streamer is a monthly series that highlights reflections and commentary from my streaming and content creation experience. I am neither an expert nor a large streamer. All advice and content are meant to provide a perspective for you to consider, not to blindly follow. Join me every month to explore the wild waters of streaming on Twitch. I hope you find these insightful in your own journey.
Jesús M. Rivera 